This is truly not meant to offend anyone, but just to help maybe, spread awareness (for lack of better term) as to what really just makes us roll our eyes and just really gets under our skin.
If you know anyone with Crohn’s disease/IBD and you’ve said these things- I’m sorry, but we’ve cursed you under our breath. Don’t take it personally though.
Just a forewarning…I’m probably not going to sugarcoat my “responses” to these either. Haha.
1) “I read online that ______ will help.” Oh. Yes. Because My doctor and I never thought of that. *eyeroll*
2) “You’re always so tired. Try drinking some caffeine or going to bed earlier.” Ya don’t say. I promise, some days caffeine just won’t help, and honestly…why become addicted and dependent on caffeine just to please YOU.
3) “Just Get Over It.” No. Get over YOURself. Bye.
4) “I’m tired of you always not feeling good.” I’m tired of you complaining of my illness that I can’t help. Trust me, if there was a cure, I’d be first in line to be cured, no matter how much it would cost.
5) “You being sick always ruins MY plans.” And your negative attitude ruins my day.
6) Hearing your “diet” advice. If you’re not our nutritionist, GI, or dietician who are familiar with our case…please keep your unwanted advice to yourself. However, if you offer a food item, but then say “oh my gosh! I didn’t even think, I’m so sorry is this something you can handle?”…it’s a totally different story- but you’re genuinely concerned and not offering unsolicited advice. If we want diet advice- we’ll ask for it.
7) “I know this guy who knows this girl who has a cousin who has a boss that has Crohn’s disease, and they went totally gluten free and they’re like basically cured. So you should really try that if you honestly want to get better.” …..-_- because we’ve never thought to try gluten free- even though a lot of us show markers for Celiacs disease, and that’s what diet we get put on most of the time before we even get a Crohn’s disease diagnosis.
8) When you say, with a totally straight face being 100% serious, XYZ can “cure” Crohn’s disease….sorry but no.
9) “Have you tried ItWorks/Plexus/BeachBody/etc? It cured my cousins uncle of their Crohn’s disease!” Oh. It’s funny that EVERY consultant for those have a cousin with an uncle who “had” Crohn’s disease, or a cousin who “had” Crohn’s disease. It’s funny you won’t show a testimony, or that they haven’t gone to their doctor or research hospital and said this is what I did and I’m cured. No. Because they can’t. Sure, it may have helped someone achieve REMISSION but guess what, they’ll snap out of remission one day. No two Crohn’s cases are the same. And I’ll say it again for anyone who still doesn’t understand.. THERE. IS. NO. CURE. FOR. CROHN’S. DISESE.
10) “…but you don’t LOOK sick..” Oh. Can you please tell me in detail what an invisible and internal illness looks like on the outside?
11) “I thought Crohn’s made you thin.” Medications make you gain weight, therefore not everyone with Crohn’s is thin. PLUS when in remission (still have Crohn’s disease) you’re more likely to gain weight as your bowels are working more properly.
12) “It’s all in your head. You’re just making yourself sick.” Why. The. Fuck. Would I make myself sick? Attention? Puh-lease. There are far less weird ways to get attention than to “fake” such a complex disease? It would be easier to fake cancer honestly.
13) When people who are fine (meaning, don’t have IBD) say “oh man my tummy hurts today, I know how you feel”. No. No you don’t. Truly, honestly. Your “bad day” is equal to my “good day”.
14) “Cant you just hold it?” Nope, I cannot. Otherwise I’ll be holding it in my underwear while it’s also leaking all down my legs and in my shoes and on the floor. Shall I smear some on you too for making such an insensitive suggestion?
15) “Didn’t you JUST go?” Probably, but why does my frequency of shitting pique your interest?
16) “I have IBS, I know EXACTLY what you’re going through”. Nope. Wrong. You don’t. There’s major differences in Irritatable Bowel Syndrome and Inflammatory Bowel Disease. Irriatable Bowel Syndrome doesn’t cause any physical damage to your intestines, doesn’t cause any bowel inflammation, and is managed by diet. Inflammatory bowel disease affects from your mouth all the way down to your butthole, causes major bowel/intestine damage, and causes many other additional problems (see my previous posts!) due to our immune systems attacking themselves. While yes, we do sympathize with y’all, because trust me- WE know how much stomach issues SUCK, please don’t say you know what we’re going through.
If this hurt your feelings, I do apologize. I just hope you realize that those things listed above- really hurt our feelings. If we could control this disease- or find ways to help manage it- we’d be doing it.
A special thanks to: Megan B, Tyler E, Khloe P, Kimberly R, Kristy S and Amanda R for all helping me compile this list.
Feel free to leave comments below- or email me at: firstname.lastname@example.org